


The Dread Pirate Mary Anne

by wanderingstoryteller



Series: No one ever said this life would be simple [32]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, F/F, Rescue Missions, Space Pirates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-12
Updated: 2019-04-24
Packaged: 2020-01-12 09:22:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18443648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wanderingstoryteller/pseuds/wanderingstoryteller
Summary: The Doctor and her friends get a call telling them that one of their friends, a certain pirate captain, has been captured by the evil Tycan empire and needs to be rescued. Adventures ensue.





	1. In which a pirate captain makes a bad decision

**Author's Note:**

  * For [spoilersweetie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spoilersweetie/gifts).



The Dread Pirate Mary Anne had something of a reputation as a great seductress and rake. She was rather proud of that reputation. No woman runs around with a swishy red coat and a very large hat with an ostrich feather unless she is attempting to cultivate some sort of image. 

As is often the case however, legends can be a bit larger than life. For all her charm and looks the captain of the renowned pirate ship, Star Chaser, didn’t actually get laid that often. 

The primary reason for this was that she absolutely never slept with members of her own crew, even if there were plenty of offers. Beyond the practical concerns of causing jealousy or drama on a small ship, there was the more serious issue of an inherent power imbalance. She’d witnessed and suffered enough at the hands officers abusing their authority, while she was in the Tycan navy, that she never wanted to do that to someone else. 

This was all very good and noble, but it did somewhat limit her options, especially as she spent nearly every waking and sleeping hour aboard her ship. With the exception of the occasional visit of a certain time traveling alpha and her lovely beta girlfriend, Mary Anne pretty much depended entirely on shore leave for any sort of release, at least of the non solitary sort.

Shore leave had become a good deal more complicated now that Star Chaser’s former home port, Delahaye Station, had been destroyed by slavers. Barataria Station was their new port of call, but it was a lot larger and thus a lot more dangerous.

Regardless, no matter how well a crew got along, spending more than six months cooped up together in space was asking a lot. Too much of that sort of thing cold lead to fights, stabbings or just a lot of yelling. As soon as Star Chaser docked at Barataria station, Mary Anne granted two thirds of the crew shore leave and went offship herself. 

For once she left behind the hat and coat. It wasn’t that she didn’t love being the Dread Pirate Mary Anne, it was just that sometimes it was nice to be just Mary for a bit. Without her trademark colors and on a station as big as Baratar she was at least a bit less likely to be recognized.

She drank with her ships boson and a few senior members of her crew in a sufficiently trashy dive until a red haired woman caught her eye across the room. When the woman sent her a drink, Mary gave her a raised glass and a smile before deciding to go become better acquainted. 

Her boson, Sally, caught her arm when she stood, leaning over to whisper in her ear. “Remember, if you’re not back before second watch, I and about half the crew are coming looking for you.”

“You worry to much old friend.” 

“Considering the bounty you have on your head, I don’t worry enough Captain.” 

Mary Anne gave her a devilish smile, “I’ll be careful, honestly you are worse than a mother.” 

“I’ve known you longer than your poor mothers ever did. Keep your tracking device on your person and be back in good time. Let’s not have a repeat of the Tortuga incident shall we?”

“You acted so shocked, honestly one would think you’d never walked into an orgy before.” 

Sally’s face remained stony. “I think your new friends were considerably more traumatized than I was when I kicked down the door blaster drawn thinking you’d been kidnapped. For everyone’s sake, let’s not do that again.”

Mary pressed her friends should, “Alright Sally, you’ve my word I’ll be back before second watch.”

“Thank you.” 

That night Mary Anne didn’t come back. By the time Sally made good on her threat to go going looking for her it was too late. The Pirate Captain was captured and bound in the hull of a bounty hunters ship well on its way back to Tyco.

 

...

 

The Doctor and her friends were on their way to the the 1964 World’s Fair when the phone rang. While a wiser or at least more organized Time Lord might have used a different ringtone for emergencies than for regular calls, the Doctor had never bothered on her consul phone. 

The somewhat aggravating result was that any time the phone on the consul rang it could be anyone from Missy calling to remind the Doctor that she was supposed to pick up her daughter Shiva from summer camp to a desperate cry for help from some distant galaxy. 

When the Doctor accepted the call a voice came over the intercom as the image solidified. ““Hello Doctor? You are the Doctor correct?”

She did not recognize the greying haired woman wearing an eye path who appeared on the TARDIS’s small view screen. She’d called using the TARDIS’s actual phone number, and very few people had that, so she must have had some kind of connection. 

Yaz recognized the woman instantly. “Admiral Pratchett,” she spat.

“Who?” asked the Doctor. 

“She was that Tycan admiral who tried to blow up Mary Anne’s ship. She would have murdered us and the entire crew of the Star Chaser if you hadn’t installed that Lovelace drive just in time.”

“Ah,” the Doctor looked back at the screen. “I don’t like you then. I never like anyone who tries to kill my friends, well except for Missy but she’s a special case.”

The seasoned admiral looked unimpressed. “I don’t need you to like me, just provide assistance.”

“And why would I do that?” 

“Because Mary Anne needs help.” 

Yaz frowned and leaned towards the screen, “Don’t you hate her?” 

For an instant the mask of solemnity seemed to slip and then just as quickly it was back. “None of that matters now. She’s been captured by the Tycan navy and if nothing is done she will be publicly executed in the new arena on Tyco’s first moon.” 

“You were more than ready to kill her before, what’s changed?” asked Yaz.

“Attempting to destroy her ship when she wouldn't surrender was a matter of duty, this is personal.”

The Doctor scrunched her nose. “I don’t even want to know how you managed those mental gymnastics.”

“If I had destroyed her ship or she had faced proper trial and hanging, her death would have been quick and clean. What the empress wants to do to her...it’s just not right.” She looked away and didn’t elaborate.”

“It must be bad if your willing to betray your empress and planet.” 

“We all have breaking points Doctor, now are you willing to help me or not?”

 

A half hour later when the Doctor switched off the communicator Graham did not wait to say. “Doctor, that is the most obvious trap I have ever seen.” 

“Yea, totally Sheriff of Nottingham level,” agreed Ryan. “Clearly she’s trying to help the Tycan empress capture you and the TARDIS.”

Yaz was in the same camp, “I didn’t believe her explanation for having your number either.  
The Doctor leaned against the consul frowning. “You don’t think the Tycan government could torture it out of Mary Anne and that Admiral Pratchett used her connections to get access to that information? I mean considering our past experiences with them…”

Yaz still shook her head. “How did they even know she had the number, much less that you have a phone?”

“The entire crew of Star Chaser knows that Mary Anne can call the Doctor,” said Graham looking troubled. 

“But I only gave the number to Mary Anne,” the Doctor chewed on her lip, it would have looked very cute if Yaz hadn’t been too worried to appreciate it. “Ryan, you didn’t give the ship number to that beta engineer did you?” 

He quickly shook his head. “No, just my cell number, not that she ever even called it.” 

Yaz began to pace, “So unless they got the number some other way, they’ve likely both captured Mary Anne and have a spy on her crew.”

The Doctor looked equally upset, “If they’ve got her, trap or not, we need to save her. She’s a friend and I don’t abandon friends.”

“We should probably at last make sure she’s actually been captured before we go rushing into a trap,” suggested Graham, who had always been a practical soul.

 

The response they got when they finally managed to get the bridge of Star Chase on the line a few minutes later was less than reassuring. They could hear the alarms through the speakers. When the boson, Sally finally appeared on the view screen everything behind her was coase. Everyone on the bridge was running around in panic and one appeared to be putting out a small fire. 

“Doctor,” said the boson. “Thank the gods. Mary Anne’s been kidnapped and were near dead in the water.” 

A short conversation revealed that when Star Chaser had tried to track and rescue their captain, after she vanished from Barataria Station, they had flown into a Tycan naval ambush. They’d managed to jump away but not before taking serious damage. 

“We think we can limp into Fiona Station for repairs, if we don’t use the Lovelace drive again, but we are out of commission for at least a week. We’ve no hope of helping the captain. It’s all up to you Doctor.” 

The Doctor searched the other woman’s face, looking for any sign of a lie or betrayal and saw nothing. 

Behind her Graham said. “Hey Sally, before we go, did you ever get the chance to watch that move?”

“Movie?” Although she had been the biggest  _ Call the Midwife _ fan of the crew and had struck up something of a friendship with Graham over the show, she had no idea why he was talking about a movie.

“You know that James Bond one on the hard drive I gave you,  _ Dr. No _ .” 

She stared at him like he was insane. 

“You should watch it. It might explain a few things.”

Vague recognition dawned on the boson’s face. She knew a clumsy attempt to pass on a coded message when she saw one. “I will then.” 

It was still anyone’s guess whether she’d be able to make the leap between being told to watch a movie with a secret mole in it and realizing there might be one in her crew.

The moment the feed cut out, Ryan thumped his grandfather on the back. “Sly. I think Sean Connery just rolled over in his grave.”

“He’s not dead.”

“He is in this century,” said Ryan. 

“So what now?” asked Yaz, already aching to start pacing again. 

“We go rescue Mary Anne of course. “ 

She paused in her step to look at her lover, “You’ve got a plan?” 

The Doctor offered her a brilliant smile. “Nah, but I’ll have one by the time we get there.”

 


	2. In which the Doctor and her companions find out they are famous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the Doctor and her companions find out they are famous

Mary Anne slowly surfaced to what she was fairly certain was the worst hangover of her life, and considering the amount of time she had spent in the Tycan navy, that was saying something. 

What had happened? Where was she? The dim light she encountered when she first opened her eyes shot daggers of pain through her head and turned her stomach. Nausea rose up and she rolled over to throw up only to find her stomach completely empty. 

She dry heaved and then rolled back over, forcing her eyes open. She was lying on her back on a thin pallet in a tiny cell, too small to even properly pace, if she had been feeling up to pacing that is. There was nothing there, save a toilet, a sink and heavy metal bars.  

What had she done, what had she drunk? Had she been thrown into a holding cell on Barataria station? No that didn’t make any sense, Barataria station had no law and order much less holding cells. No amount of booze could have possibly made her feel as bad as she did in that moment, even her bones hurt. 

Memories began to flicker back. The red haired woman, there had been something off about her. She’d had a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. That should have made her cautious but the moment she got close enough to scent that the stranger was a fellow Tycan alpha, she’d just wanted her so much. 

She’d been foolish enough to follow her back to a small room in a cheap station hotel. When she’d kissed her, she felt the other woman’s hand on the back of her neck, felt a small pinprick and then fallen into darkness. 

She’d been there a long time, fighting to waken and being sent back again and again. The woman had drugged her and kept her that way. She must have been a bounty hunter. 

Now as Mary Anne starred up into the faint florescent light of her cell she realized she’d already awakened once. More memories flowed back, hazy with distortion. She could faintly recall sitting in a chair, being asked questions, so many questions. She could remember if she’d answered. All she could recall was an unearthly sense of calm and safety. She’d never been interrogated before but she knew that the Tycan military had access to some very powerful truth drugs, things that were far more effective than traditional methods of interrogation or torture. 

Oh gods, what information had she given the empire? She had always feared that she would be captured like this and been so careful to compartmentalize information. Anything important about how to contact the resistance, faces, names, places, hell even the access codes of Star Chaser were held by different crew members.

As captain though she knew Star Chasers tactics and preferred flight path. She hoped her crew would be smart enough to change all of those now that she was captured. She’d had nothing else of value except...she knew how to contact the Doctor. She prayed to all the old gods that her interrogators hadn’t known she knew that. She had no way of knowing now, the drugs had left her memory too cloudy. 

She tried to sit up and that was a mistake. Another wave of nausea forced her back down, curling up into a small ball and fighting down a whimper. 

Distantly she heard steps approaching her cell. “The withdrawal will get worse before it gets better,” said a very familiar voice.

Of course  _ she _ would there. Mary Anne kept her eyes shut.. “Hey babe.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Why? You never minded before, at least behind closed doors.” 

All that got her was a tired sigh. “That was before you stole my ship.”

“So you keep saying. Honestly sometimes I think you loved that ship more than me.”

“You certainly did.” 

Slowly she forced herself to sit up and face the door of her cell. Somehow through sheer force of will she managed a cocky smile. “Well we both knew nothing but a lady as fine as Star Chaser could ever come between us.” 

And there she was, standing before her the woman that still haunted her dreams, Admiral Helen Pritchett. Her hair was a bit greyer, her face more lined but her back every bit as straight as it had ever been. “You turned her into a pirate ship.”

“I liberated her and half the crew.”

“And they’ll hang for it if they are ever even taken alive.”

“Then at least they’ll have known freedom.”

“Dead is dead.” 

It took everything Mary Anne had but somehow she found her feet. She stumbled and grabbed at the bars, looking into her former lover’s single eyes. 

“Death gets us all in the end. If I go out at the hands of the empire like my mothers did, then I die proudly.”

“You pretty little fool,” the admiral’s face softened. She spoke barely louder than a whisper. “You don’t deserve a death as cruel as either of your parents suffered. 

“My gene mother was shot in the arena for refusing to fight. She died defiant to the end.” 

“I would give the world to have never helped you find that video. I know it is why you mutinied.”

Mary Anne glared at her, her own emotions beginning to overwhelm her. “What the hell do you want anyway? Did you just come to gloat before my execution?”

Helen caught at her hands, covering them where she clutched the bars. “No, Mary. I’ve come to save you.” 

Hope was a very cruel thing. It rose up fierce and desperate inside of the pirate. “How?” 

“All you have to do is help the empress capture the Doctor and you will be pardoned.”

 

The Doctor and her friends realized very shortly after landing on Tyco’s first moon, Calypso, that Mary Anne was something of a folk hero there. Apparently that meant that she appeared on a lot of lurid romance novel covers. Why the empress had not suppressed the depiction of rebels in such a medium remained unclear, perhaps the books were just too popular.

Even as the the Doctor and her friends slipped through the cities busy streets, disguised as municipal workers with hat brims pulled down, it was very hard not to stare at the books.

It was easy to see why Lucy, the Tycan hitwoman that the Doctor and Yaz had met in a Calypsan prison fifty years in the future had such an obsession with the things. The damn things were everywhere, sitting front and center on nearly every newsstand and shop they passed. Women and men, men and men, women and women, and sometimes large groups embraced in every possible combination on cheap paperbacks.

Yaz wasn’t familiar enough with Tycan culture to pick up on all the symbolism that was meant to signify which people depicted were supposed to be alphas, betas, or omegas, but it seemed to her that anyone shown in a dominant role always wore red and those in more passive roles wore blue and often had flowers in their hair. 

The covers alone were all very impressive works of suggestive art. Illustrations of Mary Anne, swishy red coat and all, appeared on several novels, along with a rotating cast of characters, ranging from fellow pirates to women of her majesty's navy. Yaz was a bit amazed to find the Doctor and herself also appeared in varying levels of artistic quality on several covers of their own. Yaz shuddered when she recognized a scene from the arena. They hadn’t even gotten it correct, the Doctor stood over a defeated alpha, pulling a blushing Yaz in her arms. That really wasn’t how that had gone.

Ryan suddenly stopped dead in his tracks. “Oh my days, Grandad, there’s one with you!”

“What?” 

Graham almost ran into his back as Ryan pointed at a book at the edge of a rack. It depicted Graham standing very heroically, a microphone in hand. It was probably a reference to the broadcast he’d made the first time they came to Tyco. The fictional Graham was a bit more buff and a good deal less grey than the real one but the brown leather coat and hair cut were unmistakable. A very attractive dark haired woman in a torn white shirt, who Graham would have certainly remembered if he had ever actually met, stared at him adoringly on the cover.

Graham’s eyes got wide and then he began to laugh. “Ryan, look there’s one with you too.” 

On another cheap paperback, a shirtless Ryan appeared to be seducing a very busty imperial guard, while also snatching a set of keys from her belt loop.

Ryan looked like he was having trouble processing. “I never did that.”

“Yea and I’ve never seen Yaz wear a bodice, ripped or not, much less stand about with her hair flowing in the wind. I think a bit of artistic license might be going on with these,” said Graham.

“They totally got my coat and hair right though,” chirped the Doctor happily as she slipped over to a news stand to buy one that appeared to depict her and Yaz facing down an entire regiment of imperial guard. 

Yaz for her part just looked mortified. It hurt her pride a little bit that all of the covers showed her clinging to or even hiding behind the Doctor. That certainly wasn’t how their relationship worked. “Don’t these people have anything better to do with their time?” 

“No wonder Mary Anne and her crew loved Downton Abbey, it must have seem comparatively realistic and practical to them,” commented Graham. 

The Doctor came back with a small of books, she’d gone for more than one after all. She held up a cover that showed Mary Anne standing victorious on Star Chaser’s bridge, glaring defiantly at a naval commander, who rather looked like Admiral Pritchett on a vid screen, while a beautiful dark haired woman that looked a bit like Yaz, clung to her arm. 

“What I want to know, is how the empress thinks she can get away with publicly executing a woman that is this popular.”

“I did say it was a trap,” reminded Graham. 

“We know that,” insisted Yaz. “The question is what kind.” 

“Well that is what we are going to need to consult some local talent to figure out,” said the Doctor. “Come on let’s go find some rebels. I love a good resistance group, I do.”

 

Mary Anne stared at the hat and coat the guards had brought her. They rather looked like they’d come from a costume shop, the hat was flimsy velvet covered cardboard and the dye on the thin coat was so cheap it came off on her fingers. 

“No absolutely not.”

The guard looked at her boredly. “just put them on.” 

“No. I am the dread pirate Mary Anne, captain of the good ship Star Chaser and I will not wear a cheap costume like some half bit parody of myself.” 

“Empress’s orders.”

“The old bitch can go fuck herself.” 

“I’ve been told that a lot.” The woman that stepped into Mary Anne’s line of sight was well into her sixth decade. She’d been beautiful once, she might well have still been, but Mary Anne hated her too much to care. Even in plain clothes, the grey haired woman was impossible to mistake.

She clutched at the bars. “You!”

“Yes, me,” the empress sounded tired. 

Mary Anne had, especially during her first years in the orphanage, had an entire speech prepared for this moment. Of course in those fantasies she’d imagined a blaster in her hand and saying something along the lines of “My name is Mary Anne Hawthorne. You killed my mothers. Prepare to die.” 

Except she was unarmed and locked inside a cell. Giving the speech without the ability to deliver death seemed pointless. 

The empress looked at her as if she were a deep disappointment. “You know, you are a lot shorter than you look in the pictures.”

“So are you.”

That got her a half raised eyebrow. “You don’t look so impressive without your regular accoutrements. Is a bit of red all it takes to make a legendary pirate captain out of a traitorous starship pilot?”

“That and a loyal crew, but you probably wouldn’t know loyalty if it bit you in your royal ass.” 

“Oh I know loyalty and I know its absence. I’ve ordered the execution of more men and women before they could betray me than you’ve ever killed girl.”

Mary Anne had not in fact actually killed that many people. She’d pissed off more than could ever be counted, captured and ransomed a very large number, injured plenty but as for actually killed...well she tried to keep that number low. She was not a religious woman but she’d still been raised in the church of Mercy and she did not wish to answer for anything more than she had to when she reached the Dark Gate.  

“What do you want you conniving old bitch? I already told Admiral Pritchett I’d help you catch the Doctor.”

Said old bitch tilted her head slightly, “Honestly I just wanted to see you in person. You’ve been a vague annoyance long enough I got curious.” She stayed out of arm's length of the bars, clearly a woman well versed in speaking to prisoners. “Do tell me something, because I have wondered. The devil did you get the idea for outfit? It’s hardly practical.”

“I thought that was rather blindingly obvious.” 

The empress raised an eyebrow. “Bad burlesque?” 

“No Captain bloody Hook!”

That earned a slow blink. “The villain from that old earth book?” 

“Duh.” 

“You wanted to be the villain? Shouldn’t you have wanted to emulate that flying child in green?”

“To hell with heroes and children. I stopped being a child the night your soldiers took me screaming and crying from my home. The other inmates in that wretched orphanage were cruel to me because of who my parents had been. The one comfort I had in that place was a copy of Peter Pan that someone donated. I loved Captain Hook, he answered to no one, had a ship of his own, and a crew at his back.”

“An odd one you are. Well, go on, try on the hat and coat, you need to look your best to face down the tick-tock tomorrow. 

 

The rebels proved very easy to find, at least for the Doctor. It took her less than half an hour in a bar near the docks and she knew where to go. Something about that face of hers just made people trust her.

The rebels had their hideout in the sewers of course because, if Yaz had learned one thing about traveling with the Doctor, it was that any adventure usually involved spending half her time running in a corridor or sewer. Once they found the little underground room where the rebels usually met it took exactly three Doctor smiles, two dramatic coat swishes and one big dramatic speech to get them on their side and onboard for the rescue plan. 

No one was exactly sure what was supposed to happen in the arena the next day. All the news had said was that the mutinous starship pilot Mary Anne had been captured and was to face justice.

“The empress must be planning something big though. She scheduled the event at the arena for 6pm and is planning to broadcast it.”

“What's big about 6pm?” asked the Doctor.

The young beta rebel leader, who in her day job was probably a waitress if the black apron full of pins and notepads was any indication, said. “It’s when the soaps are on.”

“Yea, and tomorrow was supposed to be the final episode of  _ Forbidden Love,”  _ said a similarly young alpha, who was still wearing his construction workers vest and hard hat. “I really want to know if things work out for Roberto and Javier. It’s bad enough the empress oppresses the population but delaying the 6pm soap is just cruel.” 

“You people have very interesting priorities,” said Yaz.

Graham just nodded though. “Nah, I totally get where this bloke is coming from. If anyone had dared mess with Grace’s soaps there would have been hell do pay.” 

Ryan had to nod at that, he’d known his grandmother. She’d cared deeply about social justice and Downton Abbey in equal measure. 

“So entertainment aside,” said Yaz. “Doctor, what is our plan?”

The Doctor beamed, motioning to her companions and their new friends as well. “Alright everyone gather around, you are all going to love this.” 


	3. In which we learn it is important to distinguish robot alligators from robot crocodiles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we learn it is important to distinguish robot alligators from robot crocodiles

Mary Anne felt like a child playing dress up wearing a hat and coat that were too big. At least they were the right shade of crimson. She actually laughed when the guard gave her a rusty cutlass as they waited for the gate to rise.

“What am I supposed to do with this?”

“Fight. You’re a pirate aren’t you? That’s a pirate sword.”

“I’m a space pirate, thank you very much, I use a laser gun, that an creative threats and witty banter.” 

“We’re not allowed to give you a gun. You can use all the banter you want but I don’t think it will help. 

And then the bastard shoved her forward into the blinding lights, deafening noise and near choking dust of the Calypsan arena. 

It had not occurred to her until that moment to wonder who she was actually fighting. The fact that she’d been given a sword suggested that it was supposed to be some form of gladiatorial combat instead of an alpha baiting match. She neither saw nor scented any sign of an omega in heat. 

As she blinked against the blinding early morning sun she saw two other people, also looking around the arena. Was she supposed to fight them?

An announcer’s voice boomed over the loudspeakers. “The match begins when the Tick Tock is released. The match ends when either only one combatant remains or the Tick Tock is destroyed. Combatants may fight each other or the Tick Tock.”

Mary Anne still had no idea what a Tick Tock was but she knew she wasn’t going to fight other prisoners for some oppressive bitch of an empress. She looked to the young man and woman she’d been thrown into the arena with. “Best we work together to kill it, yes?” 

“Agreed,” answered the woman who smelled like a beta. Mary Anne suddenly realized suddenly that they’d once spoke to on a vid screen. She was the leader of the resistance on Calypso. When had she been captured?

“Yea,” said the young male alpha. Mary Anne could have sworn she’d talked with him before as well. 

And then a huge grate slide back and something with huge glowing red eyes began to slouch forward. The three combatants moved closer together, weapons they didn’t know how to use held out. 

The beta woman leaned over and whispered to Mary Anne. “The Doctor sent us. She knows how to defeat this thing. I just have to get close enough to get a device on it.” 

“Good.” She didn’t dare take her eyes off the emerging monster. It slunk forward with a hiss of gears and a grating of metal. 

“A robot crocodile why did it have to be a crocodile?” moaned Mary Anne. There weren’t many things she was actually afraid of but a certain picture in her childhood copy of Peter Pan had left her with something of a phobia of crocodiles. It had never really been an issue before, there were no large non sentient reptiles on Tyco or in space most of the time. Still crocodiles had featured front and center in her nightmares since girlhood. 

“I think it’s suppose to be an alligator, the snout looks rounded,” said the young man unhelpfully. 

“Not the time Bob!” yelled the beta woman, gabbing his arm and yanking him out of the way as the robot charged past where they had just been. It apparently didn’t have very good breaks because it slammed into the wall, shaking the entire arena. 

Mary Anne was more than equal to the task of getting herself out of the way. She’d never had any trouble with running away, it was something all pirate were good at. 

The mechanical reptile backed away from the wall, shook itself like a wet dog and charged again. 

“Distract it for me!” yelled the brunette woman, who Mary Anne was now very certain was the rebel leader of Calypso. 

Mary Anne was tempted to yell “how?” but knew that wouldn’t be very helpful. Instead she ran in front of the beast waving her sword. “Hey you big ugly robot. You’re so badly made we can’t tell what kind of big reptile your supposed to be.”

It quickly became clear that while the robot was likely immune to taunts it was motion sensitive and happy to still charge at her. From what she could gather, it couldn’t change course once it started. She barely dove out of the way in time as it slammed into the wall, causing the audience to cheer and scream depending on individual temperament. She lost her fake hat and didn’t care.

With far more courage that most people ever possess, the rebel leader leapt upon the robots back and slammed something against its scales. The metal monster shuddered and went still. 

“Get on!” she screamed. The young man had no problem complying. Not knowing what else to do, Mary Anne complied, accepting a hand up from the woman. As she watched the rebel fished what appeared to be a phone of of her bra and began to use it to control the robot.

Mary Anne didn’t have the chance to do much more than grab on and possible give an embarrassing scream as the huge robot turned and charged the far wall with them riding on it’s back. 

“Here’s hoping this thing can jump!” The brunet rebel sounded a lot like this was having the time of her life. 

Fortunately for them and not so much for the crowd, the robot reptile  could leap, at least sort of. The alligator got about half its body over the retaining wall. The audience understandably screamed in horror and fled, clogging most of the exits. 

The brunet rebel tapped at her phone some more and the alligator finally tipped forward and went racing up the steps and abandoned seats.

Figuring that if she was going to die she might as well go out in style, Mary Anne raised her cutlass and waved it with a crowing cheer. It was promptly shot out of her hand and she wisely ducked down.

“Shit they’re shooting at us.”

“Those bastards, we’re surrounded by civilians,” gasped the clearly terrified young man at her side.

“Almost free,” gasped the rebel leader. The alligator reached the outer wall and to all their amazement proved to actually be able to scale it. A sudden thought occured to Mary Anne and she fished the tracking device from inside her shirt and flung it over her head. 

“Fuck you! You imperial fucking bitch!” Her words were lost on the wind.

Then there was nothing to do but cling onto the robot desperately, especially once it started down the outside of the arena. They charged down the crowded street. No matter how crowded a street is, people are still capable of getting out of the way when they see a giant robot monstrosity coming. Their mount proved highly capable of running over if not leaping over cars, even if left them slightly compressed in its wake. 

They were faster than their pursuers and successfully reached the harbor where they found the huge sewer outflow tunnel they were looking for. They went down and down into the depths of the capital city on the back of a giant alligator. 

They went through tunnel, after tunnel, until distantly Mary Anne saw the blinking blue light of a very familiar box. They slammed to a stop in front of it. The Doctor was waiting, her face as brilliant as her ship’s light, a hand held out to help Mary Anne down. She accepted it gratefully. Yaz and the other companions were also there to help. 

“You shouldn’t have come. It was a trap. They had soldiers waiting.”

“I know. I came anyway.” 

“They tried to make me turn on you. Gave me a tracking device and a communicator but I threw them away.”

“Good, come on. Let's get out of here.”

Mary Anne wanted nothing more than that. Still a sense of unease tugged at her. She quickly shrugged off the cheap coat. “Wait, scan this.”

The Doctor did. “Yup, there’s a tracking device.” One zap and the wretched thing was smoking.

Another darker thought occurred to Mary Anne. She doubted that the empress was actually convinced she’d betray the Doctor. “scan me too.”  

The Doctor’s face fell as her sonic buzzed. “There’s something tiny and electrical in your left side.”

Mary Anne’s left hand fell there. She was badly bruised and cut up enough she couldn't even guess which cut or injury had been caused by the insertion. 

“Can you get it out?”

“It’ll be easier in the med bay.”

“You can’t take me into the TARDIS like this. We don’t know what it will do to your ship.” 

“I can’t leave you.”

The sound of footsteps echoed down the tunnel. “Right, guess I’m going for an alligator ride.” She grabbed Mary Anne’s hand as she snatched the phone like tablet from the rebel leader. Over her shoulder she called “Yaz my darling, can you hop the TARDIS to safety? I’ll call you when were ready for a pickup.”

“Yea, take a knife,” Yaz slipped a closed pocket knife into one of the Doctor’s pockets. After being tied up enough times, she’d started carrying one, also because she never knew when there would be food that required cutting or a wine bottle that wanted opening. The last time the Doctor had tried to open a wine bottle with her sonic, it had not ended well.  

“I don’t like them.”

“You got a better way to cut out a tracking device?” 

Their argument was cut off by a laser blast burning into a nearby wall. “Everyone into the TARDIS!” barked the Doctor as she swung up onto the alligator. She blew a kiss to Yaz and then rode off on the giant robot down the tunnel, drawing away their pursuers so the TARDIS would have time to hop away. 

“We just have to lose them,” yelled the Doctor as they plunged deeper into darkness. 

“What part of tracking device don’t you understand?” 

“We just need a good lead then.” 

At some point they stopped going down and started going up again. They burst forth through a metal sewer grate into the surf of Circe Bay. To both their amazement, the metal alligator floated. 

“Lie back,” said the Doctor hurriedly fishing out her sonic and the swiss army knife. She buzzed the blade with the sonic, the way one might pass a knife over a flame to sterilize it. 

“Anything for you beautiful,” said Mary Anne with false bravado. 

The Doctor hurriedly scanned her side and then opened the knife. “Hold the sonic for me.”

Mary Anne did and then realized her mistake the moment the blade bit into her skin. She looked away before a single drop of crimson could well up. 

The Doctor paused, “You okay?”

“Yea, I just can’t see my own blood or I faint. It’s some kind of vasovagal syncope.” She had to grit her teeth as the knife cut into her skin. It seemed sharper than a pocket knife should have. Maybe the Doctor had been able to use her sonic to fix that as well. 

“How do you manage being a pirate captain?” It was somewhat disconcerting that she could in her usual chipper tone as she dug a blade in her friends side. 

Mary Anne gritted her teeth. It was taking everything she had not to flinch away. “Why do you think I’ve got a giant bloody red coat? If I get hurt in the heat of battle, it keeps me from seeing the blood from the injury.  

“Got it!” crowed the Doctor suddenly. She held up a tiny micro chip that Mary Anne wisely didn’t turn her head to see. The Doctor smashed the chip in her bloodied hand and then washed away both blood and electrical bits in the shallow waves they were floating on. She bandaged Mary Anne’s side with an emergency compression bandage she had in one of her many pockets. 

She’d just called Yaz to come get them when their pursuers burst through the already mostly destroyed sewer outlet. There were about three hover vehicles, each with both a pilot and a secondary shooter, each holding a rather large energy weapon. 

The Doctor tried to urge the alligator to swim away. Unfortunately while it did float, it was not actually built to swim very quickly. When restreate failed, the Doctor tried talking. 

“Hi, fancy meeting you folks here.” 

“Surrender of the die!” barked one of the men holding a gun. 

“How about option C. I do love a third option.”

“There is no option C.”

“Really because I’ve already taken it.”

With perfect timing, the TARDIS materialized around the Doctor and Mary Anne, just as their pursuers fired. Inside the TARDIS, Yaz, Ryan and Graham raced around pulling levers and pressing buttons. The two rebels watched in rapt amasement, they appeared to still be recovering from their, “it’s bigger on the inside,” moment. An instant later they were safely in space. 

“You didn’t bring the robot alligator,” said the Doctor with an impressive pout.

Yaz stepped from the consul to kiss her lover light. “Sorry babe,  I was worried it might have had a tracking device of its own.”

Whatever the Doctor might have said next was lost, when Mary Anne made the mistake of looking down at her side and saw her bandage had soaked through. 

Ryan may have had dyspraxia but he still managed to catch her before she hit the ground. Unfortunately he also started to lose his own balance. Graham and the others raced to help.

 

Once Mary Anne had come back around and actually had her wound properly cleaned and bandaged, this time with a dark cloth to avoid any further fainting, they dropped off their new rebel friends. 

The Doctor gave them some modified broadcasting equipment that she said would let them break into any television or radio broadcast they wanted while remaining completely untraceable. It was all they would really need to start chipping away at the last pillars of empire. 

The Doctor wanted to go deal with the empress personally, possibly at screwdriver point. That was not who she was though. She knew that Tyco and its moons had to change on their own terms. It was up to Mary Anne and people like the rebels to do it, not her. If she took out the empress, she’d leave a power vacuum that could likely make the people of Tyco and all its moons worse off than if she never acted. 

They hopped back onto Star Chaser to great joy and acclaim. The Doctor was even kind enough to help them fix their damaged systems and make some upgrades while Ryan slipped off with the pretty engineer turned cook he still sort of had a thing with. Graham went to go talk about his favorite shows with his friends in the crew. 

The Doctor had just finished with the damaged Lovelace drive when the bosun, Sally, asked if she could have a word. She led her to what was apparently the chart room. It was a space about the size of a large closet with a great deal of printed star charts and even more random mechanical bits sitting about. Mary Anne was already there.

“I found the spy who sold out the captain,” said the aging beta the moment the door closed. “She doesn’t know I’m onto her yet.”

“Who?” asked Mary Anne.

“Ingie.”

“Ingie? That woman is quieter than a church mouse. I wouldn’t have thought she’d have the courage.” 

“Motherhood can have that effect on a person. The secret police have her daughter. I intercepted and read some messages.”  

Mary Anne frowned. She’d wanted to be angry that she’d been betrayed but this wasn’t a situation where she could be, instead she just felt like she’d failed a crewmember. “I never even knew she had a kid.” 

Sally shook her head wearily. “She never said but she’s got the number tattoos on her arm of an omega who escaped the breeding camps. She must have had the child there.” 

“I’m guessing you want me to go find and rescue her daughter?” asked the Doctor.

“Yes. We can’t allow Ingie to remain on the crew now that we know she’s the source of the leak but I understand why she did what she did. I was a mother once myself.” 

Something in the look Mary Anne gave the bosun suggested that this wasn’t something she’d ever heard before. Sally just shrugged. “It’s a long story for another time. Right now we need the Doctor to go find Ingie’s little girl so we can safely kick Ingie off the crew.” 

“Alright,” said the Doctor, “Give me all the info you have.”

 

It wasn’t hard to find the child in a Calypsan orphanage. The Tycan empire kept meticulous records. They hadn’t even really hidden the toddler, apparently no one thought a member of the resistance would actually come to find her. They had certainly not thought their spy aboard Star Chaser would be able to. 

Like all children who had been born as a ward of the state, the three year old had the last name Tyco. Someone, somewhere along the way had given her a first name, along with a number. Sadly whoever had named her hadn’t been a very imaginative soul and had gone with Buttercup. The large number of flower based names on the little line of beds the Doctor walked down rather suggested that whoever was in charge of naming the children had simply used a botanical text. One pore child was named Agave, and another Cedar.

The whole place felt cold and austere. The Doctor wanted to take all of the children, except even she didn’t know a place she could easily and safely place five hundred children. They were safe and fed for the moment at least. 

As she got closer to the cot she was seeking, she heard a voice speaking softly. “ All children, except one, grow up...” 

A middle aged woman, wearing a nurses smock was sitting on the edge of a bed, about seven little girls gathered around her in spite of the late hour. She had one very small little black haired child in her lap. She looked up nervously and set down the colorful book when the Doctor got closer. “Can I help you?”

The Doctor held out her sonic paper. “I’m looking for a three year old named Buttercup Tyco.” She couldn’t bring herself to give the child’s number. Children shouldn’t have numbers. 

“You’re from the ministry then.” She turned to the other children. “Girls, go to bed.”

“Yes,” lied the Doctor.

The woman’s lip thinned as she looked at the paper and instinctively she drew the child in her lap closer. “She’s a good little girl. Don’t let any harm come to her. 

“Of course not,” the Doctor knelt to put herself eye level with the little girl. 

She was surprised when she felt the woman’s arm on hers. “I’ve read the child’s file. I just...I can’t let you take her, not knowing why she’s being kept here. Please, it would be so easy to change a few papers, slip her into a bed in a different orphanage. She’s just a baby, she shouldn’t be caught up in all of this.” 

The Doctor raised her head and very softly she said. “Forgot what the paper said, look at my face.”

The nurse's dark eyes went. “You...your the Doctor,” she whispered. “I know your face from the romance novels.”

The Doctor gave her best smile. “Yes I am, but you’d best tell them that someone with proper documentation from the ministry came for the child not me.” 

“You’ll keep her safe?” 

“You have my word. I’m taking her to her mother.”

Something between sorrow and joy filled the woman’s face before it began to dissolve into tears. “Bless you dear.”

The the Doctor reached for the little girl. “Hey Buttercup, I’m the Doctor and I’m going to take you to meet your mum okay?”

The little girl eyed her uncertainty but allowed herself to be picked up. She made it about halfway through the room before she realized she was being taken. 

“Nurse Kay! Nurse Kay!” She went very quickly from calling to screaming and then she started kicking and even biting. The Doctor had to run for the TARDIS for fear of waking the entire orphanage. 

Once the little girl was safely on the TARDIS it took several hours, a mug of hot chocolate with marshmallows, and Graham reading about twenty children's books from the TARDIs library before Buttercup finally calmed. 

Mary Anne, Sally and the unlucky Ingie were waiting in the Star Chasers cargo bay when they thumped in. 

As soon as the Doctor opened the door Ingie rushed forward to grab her arm, eyes wide and half made with desperation. “You’ve got her?”

“Yes.”

The young woman pushed past the Doctor in her rush to get into the TARDIS and the child she had not seen since she’d been ripped from her arms years before.

Mary Anne and Sally were more somber. “Have you got somewhere safe to take them?” asked Mary Anne. “The ship not being a safe place for children aside, I can’t keep a woman on my ship who turned on her own captain or you Doctor.” 

“Yea, I know a place.”

Angstrom was not exactly thrilled when the Doctor and her TARDIS appeared in Haven not for a booty call, or to bring her more supplies, but to deposit two new refugees. All the same she still welcomed Ingie and her daughter with open arms. When the Doctor offered to help fix her power generator again, all was forgiven.

Graham and Ryan went off to check on Evie and Yaz sat down in the warm afternoon sun outside the equipment shed to have a drink with Angstrom.

“What what have you and the Doctor been up anyway?”

“Have I ever got a story for you.”   

 

...

 

Afterwards/ Some Extras 

 

Excerpts from several romance novels purchased by the Doctor on Calypso. 

 

**Radio Ga Ga**

 

_ Graham set down the microphone, his ruggedly handsome face lined with worry. “It’s done. God help me, I’ll surely hang for it but its done. I’ve told the people what the empress did.” _

_ Josephina reached for him, her ample bosom heaving with emotion. “You were so brave my love.” _

_ The silver fox looked down into the rebel leaders beautiful emerald eyes, “For you my love I would challenge the very stars in the sky.” _

_ “I am so afraid,” she murmured. _

_ “Then let me comfort you,” and he brought their lips together, kindling to the growing sparks between them.  _

 

 

**Love in the Arena**

 

_ The Doctor stood over her vanquished foe, her strong shoulders still tensed with rut aggression. The alpha that had challenged her, threatened to take her mate, lay unconscious at her feet. All around her roared the arena crowd, hungry for more than just blood. _

_ “Doctor! You saved me.” cried Yasmine, rushing to embrace her mate. _

_ The Doctor pulled the small omega into her arms, breathing in the scent of her heat, seeing the desire in her wide dark eyes. “You are mine.” _

_ “Yours, always yours. Take me Doctor, you must take me. If you don’t knot not me soon, I’ll lose my mind.” _

_ She drew her mate closer and kissed her with all the wildly possessive passion and need the fight had instilled in her.  _

 

 

**Ryan, Rescue Hero**

 

_ Like most omegas, Ryan was no fighter but he had other talents, seduction chief among them. He pressed the guard against the wall, kissing at her neck and turning the alpha woman's legs to jelly. _

_ “Really, I should get back. I’ve been away from my duties for too long,” she murmured. _

_ “Is that what you really want?” Ryan asked, running a hand down her side. He just needed to get a bit lower to reach her keys where they were clipped to her belt.  _

_ “No, I want you. I want you so much you handsome boy,” whispered the voluptuous guard in his ear before pulling him into a desperate kiss.  _

_ Ryan was very distracted but not so distracted that he failed to finally grab the keys, unclip them and slide them into his own pocket. The alpha wasn’t done with him yet though. _


End file.
